Wednesday, February 09, 2011

filling my heart

I have lived most of my life without art as I now know it.
If any of you might have read my story here, you know my life story is really "not so climatic", as I lived out the very first part (17 years) of my life in the rural part of Texas...
which is really not that far from where I now live.
My first five years were spent on a small ranch just a couple miles down the road from the ice cream capital of the world (*wink*), Brenham, Texas, 
which is the home of Blue Bell ice cream!  YUM!  YUM!
I have so many memories of those days.  It often even amazes me, as we lived very VERY modestly, in a little "provided" wood frame house with a leaking roof when it rained.
But, I loved it there.  The bluebonnets were everywhere in the Spring, and the meadows full of tall green grass...which was ideal for a cattle ranch.
Perhaps if we would have stayed there, at that little ranch where my father was the foreman, I would have been able to take art lessons, as my older sister actually did in nearby Brenham.  
But, when I was five years old, my father had the opportunity to move closer (and make a better salary) to the area he and my mother were born, in New Ulm, Texas, which was only about 30+ miles from Brenham. 
This ranch, which was almost 600 acres, was quite a distance from a larger town such as Brenham, or even nearby Bellville, where I eventually attended four years of high school.  Once I began elementary school,
it required a long bus ride of at least one hour to and from school.  And, an even longer ride once I began high school, which was almost 30 more miles away.
Art classes were not in the family budget,
nor was the distance for me to attend one even remotely considered.
Without repeating the whole story, I think you get the idea.  
So, now....each day as I fill my hours wondering what exactly I might want to do next, 
I often find myself tearing up.  I have so many things in my heart, crying to come out.
I am still that little girl who cried when she was told she couldn't take art lessons.  I have been waiting so many years to learn what making my kind of art really feels like.
I hope that where ever you are today, you are making the art you have longed to make.
Maybe I sound like a broken record.  Maybe I am writing to you, as you wonder why am I even trying to do this.  Make art.  Who am I to think I can do it? 
I just know that I never gave up.  I always kept looking and searching.
And, one day, it just happened.  
I found a small peek into what I would be doing full time...just about 5 years ago.
I wish for you that all those dreams you have held deep inside your heart,
do come true.
And, that your ♥ is filled today and every day after this one.
Filled with art.
P.S. I hope the top picture helped answer your request Margo....thanks for asking =)


Charlene said...

I CAN'T WAIT!!!!!!!!! It is zeron degrees wind chill factor here today. All I can say is when we go outside I tell Elle POTTY FAST! Can't wait to come south to be with you, JoAnne, Rita & the other girls. We'll have so much fun & Daddy can "Potty Fast"! It's his turn. HUGS!

Unknown said...

...I can see the beauty inside of your heart, and understand your fluttering wings ~ always taking flight ~ speading the light within you and trying to show others the way...
such an inspiration to see another butterfly just doing what she loves, and in return, all we see is the trail of her beauty:)

adore your creative visions
xo, Rosemary

ps LOVE the heart bokeh pic!!

Margo said...

YES! It's perfect and beautiful! Thank you Diane! Only 5 years ago?? Then, there is hope for me yet!!



Jen Crossley said...

I Loved hearing about where you lived.Im so glad you didnt give up your dream to make beautiful art you are a gift to us all.

Alice said...

We visited Blue Bell ice cream factory a few years ago and just loved it!

When I was 7 my father moved us from the city to the small rural town where he was raised. He was a blue-collar worker with no insurance, and my mother didn't learn to drive until late in life. Though I loved art, and actually had a skill in calligraphy and sketching, we were too poor to spend money frivously on art classes. Plus they were too far away, and us girls were encouraged to become homemakers--not artists or athletes or anything else. It was many, many years later that I realized art was a part of what made me ME, and that's when I started making jewelry in 2007. It's often difficult to fit it all in with a busy schedule, but I hear the call in the whispers of the wind filling my heart with hopes of meeting other artists, and venturing out into new territories.

Thanks for a lovely, inspiring post!

Pretty Things said...

This is such a beautiful post.

Laura Twiford said...

Diane I really enjoyed you post, it hit very close to home. I started my blog last summer with just such a post, you'd probably really enjoy reading them, if you go, just search the topic "finding my muse" and read the beginning few posts. thanks so much for sharing and i'm glad you have found your bliss!

Chris said...

I love hearing your story, as it is familiar in my deepest heart. If we continue, even just a teeny bit by bit, to create our art and bring our voice into the world, we will be nurturing that little girl. You know, that little girl who had to swallow her dreams for many years.
I love your story, I've loved seeing your growth into the woman you are today...the woman joyously creating, teaching and making this world better.
Bless you gal!

sharon said...

A beautiful and eloquent post, it touches my heart, and it always shows in your work.

Shannon Roberts said...

I am still trying to find my art also inspire me...

stregata said...

Being creative is our birthright and an essential part of our souls. It is a pity that our culture and society does not aknowledge and teach this to us - I do believe the world would be a much more wonderful and peaceful place.
I am so glad you have be able to find your way and I am sure you have much more art within you to explore and share, Diane. Spread your wings!

Anonymous said...

What a seriously beautiful post about your state of becoming....we can't wait to see what is next for you too!!!

The Joy of Nesting said...

Lady Dy,

You must remember that nothing ever "just happens" You are where you are suppose to be. Arriving there took many years of sacrifice,work,holding steadfastly to your dreams, and listening to your heart!!! Yes you are very blessed to have what many will never obtain. But you are there because you allowed your dreams to become real. Be proud of what you have accomplished, for you are indeed a rare and beautiful soul!!

Pattie ;)
Mazatlan Mx.

nanazanne said...

hi diane, your story tugged at my heartstrings, i remember art class and while intrigued was never encouraged and so never pursued that trail til late in life~~bless you..zanne

Suz said...

Clearly, your art was always inside you and when given half a chance in your adult life, has just burst forward into a wonderful, unique talent. You are growing and learning all the time now, even since I have known you, and are truly taking flight! I'm proud just watching!

Leslie A. Hawkins said...

I so desire to be where your at. I'm a SAHM and would love to "make a living" at it to help out. I desire to create daily and you help to inspire that. Thank you! Come over for a visit.

Anonymous said...

Hi Diane,
I just love your jewelry, it is so beautiful! I am a jewelry designer as well and you have been such an inspiration to me!
Wishing you a lovely day.